Funny People…For Reals – SF SketchFest Delivers Comedy For Connoisseurs

The 9th annual SF Sketchfest is wrapping up today, spanning three weeks of laugh-o-lympics, led by a mix of the top name comedians and under the radar funny people who are just about to break.

I attended the festival this year as both an audience member and a participant.

Opening night at the SF Mezzanine featured a blistering performance from Neil Hamburger (O my stars, don’t get on his bad side), just off his tour with Pucifer. Hamburger was opening up for Tim and Eric’s band, Pusswhip Bang Bang.

backstage for Pusswhip Bang Bang

The audience at the Mezzanine were excited to see their nerdy Adult Swim heroes come out in spandex and sing bad seventies and eighties throwbacks but it was a bit of a let down as Tenacious D, and many other bands (Knights of Monte Carlo, Trainwreck, etc.) do musical band parody better. Anyone hoping for comedy bits or films mixed in with the songs went home disappointed.

Over at the Purple Onion, I performed in Joke-E-Oke, a show put on by  funnyman Harmon Leon and produced by Showtime’s Green Room host, Paul Provenza. Joke-E-Oke is a cool blend between game show and improv styled roast, where contestants have to get up onstage and perform stand up bits from legendary comedians. As they perform, they are judged, and heckled, by a panel of judges. The final round is a Don Rickles-off of ‘Yo Momma’ type insults until one person stands as the king of comedy.

Harmon led us into madness as the host for the evening with guest judges Paul Provenza, Mark Pitta and Rick Overton. Rick was also one of the featured comedians on the Joke-E-Oke wheel which was quite daunting. You don’t want to have to ape the judge. Imitation may be the highest form of flattery but it’s difficult when the subject could be making fun of you to your face.

Harmon at the Purple Onion

I was picked to go on first and I got Chris Rock as my Joke-E-Oke comedian to parrot. Which was perfect because though I may be a white girl, I think those that know me will agree – everything about my demeanor screams Chris Rock.

Ali Rock

Chris Rock

The evening progressed and I kept advancing to the next round. I made it into the final round opposite audience favorite Kozumi, who did an AMAZING Sam Kinison. It was tough having to insult her to her face, but I summoned up my inner bitch. In fact, I just imagined I was back in LA and it came quite naturally. Luckily we were both crowned as champs.

with Rick Overton, Robin Williams and Kozumi at Joke-E-Oke

Joke-E-Oke was being filmed as a pilot and will be coming soon to a TV network near you. If you love stand up comedy, you will love this show.

The festival had an amazing cross section of panel discussions (Reno 911 cast, Mystery Science 3000 cast), sketch and improv shows (Upright Citizens Brigade, Whitest Kids U’ Know), artists in discussion (Weird Al Yankovic in discussion with Chris Hardwick) cabaret shows, podcasts, a tribute to Conan O’Brien (which was canceled when he was understandably unable to attend) and lots of stand up. Only in this environment could you see author Dave Eggers mixing with Nina Gordon from Veruca Salt. Or having to make a decision on whether to go to see Dana Gould, Rob Huebel or Dick Cavett!

Dick Cavett

I was able to catch political live wire Jamie Kilstein at the Punch Line. He did a great bit about that included political comedy a bit on corporate music, labels and MTV which is something I’ve been talking about here for a while. I highly recommend him.

Jamie Kilstein

What was to come next really knocked me out of my seat. I see live shows so often that I am rarely moved anymore. I’m like the Anna Wintour of live entertainment – you won’t get much of a reaction out of me. I’m so focused on the event and I’m so in ‘work’ mode that I’m rarely caught up in the emotion of the song/joke/dance, etc.

Enter Reggie Watts. Holy hell! Reggie, a former musician in the 90′s, does a comedy act which involves using pedals, loops and beats and…voices. He uses all these different accents and voices and moves in and out of them so seamlessly that it’s nearly impossibly to figure out which is his own. And it’s all very stream of consciousness…I was on the edge of my seat. I was fascinated. I really can’t remember the last time a performer showed me something that caused me to stare, slack jawed. Reggie Watts. Get ready for him.

Reggie Watts

Oh San Francisco, I love you. I love the crazy graffiti murder hotel room I stayed in.

I love the weird signs and window dressings warning people walking by.

And I loved Sketchfest. My only complaint with the festival is that there was so much comedy and I was unable to see it all. The festival ran January 14th – February 2nd. If you live in San Francisco, that’s got to be the greatest gift ever…the super bowl of cutting edge comedy for twenty days in your own back yard. If like me, you were visiting, performing and then leaving, it was sad to say goodbye to so many good shows. Luckily I do live in LA and I am in close proximity to some pretty crazy geniuses.

Maybe there will be a festival of this caliber closer to me. Or maybe the television networks will get smart and put more comedy on the air.

Until then, Sketchfest is entirely worth the trip.

Kozumi doing Eddie Murphy at Joke-E-Oke:

Sarah Palin’s Heavy Metal Parking Lot

I really hesitate to open this can of worms because I could rail for HOURS on the sheer stupidity of many of my fellow countrymen who, much like lemmings, will blindly follow a flag waving harpy who has NO ideas and NO real discernible policy, because she is ‘realness’ and for ‘freedom’, ‘conservativeness’, and ‘stuff’.   At first I laughed this woman off, who luckily sank the presidential bid of Mr. McCain. But I realize that this woman is dangerous in that she is charming, ambitious and stupid.

Now, I realize that not all conservatives are stupid. I may not agree with them, but I wouldn’t say they are stupid. However, these people lining up to buy her book? OM MY KRISHNA!!! Did central casting feed these people lines? INCREDIBLE!!!

Here is a rather brilliant piece which rather speaks for itself. Mind you, there is no trickery involved here. Ya can’t blame Katie Couric for any tough questions. This man just asked these people why they liked Sarah Palin, why they’d vote for her, and why they though she’d make a good president. Pretty simple right?

Well, ok, not everyone is super smart. And not everyone understands foreign policy. Or domestic policy. Or policy for the people not from America, too. Not everyone went to a G-dblessed fancy college or can read a newspaper. Heck, they are so expensive, and the media lies, so it’s hard to really know what’s going on with the economy. Or health care. Or the economy. Or Obama’s birth certificate.

It’s times like this when I really cringe at technology and YouTube and the thought of the internet carrying this far and wide across the globe. Sorry, world.

So, it’s really not these people’s fault that they resemble the kids of Heavy Metal Parking Lot as my fellow comic cattle prod, Harmon Leon, has brilliantly pointed out. I personally think it’s a bit insulting to metal fans, who at least have taste, but I digress. Here is a mash-up between the above footage and the Heavy Metal Parking Lot film that Harmon put together.

Spooky, innit?

I’m beginning to think that the country deserves Sarah Palin. At least the country of Ohio does.

A Wolf In Ed Hardy Clothing – Behind The Scenes At The Pick Up Artist Summit

I am lucky enough to be invited to lots of interesting events from the most rocking concerts to fringe to freak flag waving nights of hedonism. Sometimes, though it may be a bit off topic for me, I am offered a curiosity I just can’t pass up on.

My friend, Harmon Leon, is the brilliant and warped mind behind Strike TV’s Infiltrator and Freedom Haters. As you might remember, I wrote an essay on the Hollywood dream for his book American Dream. I also played his tacky girlfriend in a brilliant Infiltrator piece on gun control which you can read about here.

From time to time Harmon and I will chat about what projects we are working on or events we are covering:

ME: I’m going to interview Wolfmother this weekend. How about you?

HARMON: Oh, I’m going to Vegas to join ‘Hookers for Jesus’ for the weekend.

Say wha? Well, no offense to the Cosmic Egg dudes but that kinda trumps my rock journo dealio. No question.

So when Harmon had to preach to sinners and hand out bibles in casinos with former ladies of the night, I gladly stepped in for him when he couldn’t be in LA for the 2009 PUA World Summit. That’s PUA, as in: Pick Up Artist. A whole hotel convention ball room filled with pick up artists running their ‘game’ on girls and spreading the word on how to land birds. Um, yeah. I have to go.

With Harmon’s best wishes and a little Hooker Jesus prayer, I tarted myself up in my tiger dress and went to the Renaissance hotel.  I thought about this move and knew I had two options. Wear three multi-media Cosby sweaters and glasses and make it easy for them to talk to me as an asexual journalist…or basically go dressed as a blow up doll personified and see if they can contain themselves long enough to make a slimeless impression on the world. Yes, I knew I was throwing myself to the wolves, but it’s what we embedded journalists do. We put ourselves in harms way for the story. I braced myself for the onslaught of Drakkar Noir.

I checked in as Harmon’s replacement – he being a columnist for Penthouse, and whipped out my little flip camera. I was a bit concerned I was going to be shunned – I thought I would be seen as the enemy seeing as I had ovaries and all, but I was greeted with open arms, a gift bag filled with k-y jelly and condoms, and lots of pick up lines. Someone thought their game was going to work and work fast.

I met with the PUA summit founder Vince Kelvin and he introduced me to a few of the speakers, Hypnotica, Speer, Mehow and Sexual Chocolate who all proceeded to tell me that they were NOT like Mystery and the OLD game. That was about trying to trick a woman into bed. Boo to that. The real purpose of this weekend’s conference was to help men become better men so that they could be better for us women.

Wow, that’s like just what I wanted to hear. Because I’d be a bit turned off if they were trying to pick me up or trying to just get me into bed. But I can really get behind a bunch of guys who are trying to improve their lives and be better for me. I guess I had this whole ‘pick up artist’ and ‘game’ scene wrong. Mea culpa.

True, the tables of ‘Cassanova Crew’ tees, Affliction and Ed Hardy clothes racks, and flyers promising to be part of the ‘pussy pounding posse’ didn’t quite match what they were telling me. But when I brought this up to them, I was told that all the merch was just promotional to get the guys in the door. Once the dudes were in the door, that’s when the real healing and transformation began. It was set up that way. For us women. For women all over the world.

It was very educational. From learning about how to loosen a girl up, to discovering that the holy spirit is actually spunk – I can only imagine the knowledge passed on to the guys who went through the whole weekend master class.

I’ve included some clips of my conversations below complete with bits of NLP, subliminal anchoring via touch and speech patterns, and blatant inappropriate flirting. And yes, I did get asked out on a couple dates. They seemed really nice. I think they’d like me even if I was wearing a big ole Cosby sweater. Should I go?

The America Dream – my essay in a new book!

Last year I wrote an essay on the Hollywood dream for my friend Harmon Leon, and now it’s being published in his new book American Dream.

It’s been recommended by Howard Stern, jimmy Kimmel, and other funny folk.

The book is out on October 6th, but you can pre-order your copy NOW on Amazon.

Amazon. com: The American Dream:
http://www. amazon. com/American-Dream-Immigrant-Christian-Believers/dp/1568583524/ref=pd_bbs_sr_2?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1221242315&sr=8-2

I’m pretty excited as Harmon is an excellent writer and very funny comedian. I’m honored to be sharing page space with him.

Join the Ali Empire before I get too expensive for you…order now!

More publishings from me soon.

xoxo
Ali